Why Starting a Big Goal Is Often the Hardest ParT

I’ve had a pull-up on my list of goals for around 15 years. It’s one of those things I’ve always wanted to be able to do, but never quite got around to properly working towards. Every now and again it would make its way onto my goals list, but somehow there was always a reason why it could wait and I think part of the problem was that I knew it wasn’t going to be easy.

There’s something quite daunting about starting a goal when you already know the road ahead is going to be long. If you think you can achieve something in a few weeks, it’s relatively easy to get started. But when you look at something and think, this could take months, maybe even a year, it can be tempting to put it off altogether. You know how much effort is going to be involved before you’ve even taken the first step.

That’s exactly what happened with my pull-up.

A goal I kept putting off

As a family, we used to set ourselves goals at the beginning of each year and then, at the end of the year, see who had achieved the most. A pull-up appeared on my list year after year. At the time, I honestly had no idea how difficult a pull-up actually was. I was reasonably fit and in good shape, so I remember thinking that surely I could probably manage 10. Ten! Who did I think I was – Lara Croft?!

The reality was very different. I didn’t even own a pull-up bar and if I’m completely honest, I wasn’t doing anything like enough to make the goal happen. I wanted the result, but I wasn’t prepared to put in the work required to get there.

That’s an important distinction when it comes to goals. It’s easy to say I want to do this, but wanting something and actually making a plan to achieve it are two very different things.

It wasn’t until my partner bought me a pull-up bar for my birthday last September and I finally put it up, that I had that rather humbling moment of realising just how far away I actually was.

Starting from a very different place

Then, just as I was beginning to think about how I was going to tackle the goal, I had a setback. Early December I herniated my C4/C5 disc in my neck and trapped a nerve, which resulted in around six to seven weeks of intense pain. After that, I was left with significant shoulder pain which continued for months. So the pull-up had to wait. It wasn’t until mid January that I could start doing some of the basics and even something as simple as a passive hang was difficult. Grip strength was one of my first hurdles. I hadn't appreciated how hard it would be just to hang onto a bar, but gradually I started building that strength and could hang for longer.

From there I began incorporating active hangs, scapular pull-ups and inverted rows, gradually building the strength and control needed for the movement. These exercises were challenging, but they were all achievable, which was both encouraging and frustrating because I still felt nowhere near being able to actually pull myself up.

I started working on negatives too, getting myself to the top of the bar and then lowering myself down under control. Initially I was doing these relatively quickly, but over time I began slowing the movement right down, working towards five to eight seconds on the way down. The eccentric, or lowering, phase is generally stronger than the lifting phase, so I found I was actually quite good at these. The problem was that I still couldn’t initiate the pull-up from the bottom, I just felt I’d hit a plateau and wasn’t sure how to progress.

Finding progress in the small things

A friend then suggested that I try jumping into the movement from a slightly bent-arm position rather than starting with completely straight arms. The jump helped me get through that initial part of the movement (the hardest part), meaning my muscles didn't have to overcome quite as much resistance from a dead hang. That felt like a breakthrough.

I started with one repetition and gradually built up to three or four. For the first time, I could actually feel myself getting stronger and getting closer to the movement I wanted to achieve.

There was another complication too: the grip. An underhand grip, essentially a chin-up, felt much stronger for me because I could rely more on my biceps. A neutral grip was also more manageable, whereas an overhand pull-up was considerably harder. Given the ongoing shoulder pain, the underhand grip was also more comfortable, so that was where I spent much of the early part of my training.

Seven months into the process, I can now do a small jump into an overhand grip or, if the bar is low enough, I can start with a slight bend in my arms rather than needing the jump. At the moment I can probably manage about two of those. It might not sound like a huge achievement, but when I compare it with where I started, it absolutely is.

The mindset shift

The biggest change, though, hasn't actually been physical. It's been in my mindset. For years, doing a pull-up was something I wanted to do. It was a goal I kept writing down, but because I wasn't really working towards it, it remained something that felt distant and slightly unrealistic. Now it feels different. I still can't do the full pull-up I want to achieve, but I know what I'm working on and I have a much better understanding of what it will take to get there. I’m confident that if I keep training consistently and work on the areas where I’m weakest, eventually I will be able to do it. That confidence matters because it changes the way you approach a long-term goal. Instead of constantly asking yourself, Why can't I do this yet?, you start looking at what you can do now that you couldn't do before. I can hang for over a minute now. I can control my negatives. I can do jumping repetitions. I can work with an overhand grip. I can feel where I am getting stronger and where I still need to improve. None of those things is the end goal, but they're all part of the journey towards it.

The hardest part might be starting

I think this applies to so many goals, not just fitness. Sometimes we put something off because we know it will take time. We look at the distance between where we are now and where we want to be and it feels overwhelming. It can seem easier not to start at all than to commit to something when we know we're going to have to work at it for months. But the time is going to pass anyway. If I had started seriously working on my pull-up five years ago, perhaps I would have achieved it by now. But I didn't, and there's no point wishing I'd started sooner. What I can do is start now. And that applies whatever your goal happens to be. You don't have to know exactly how long it will take, and you certainly don't have to be capable of doing the end result when you begin. You just need to be willing to start where you are and accept that the early stages might feel a long way from where you want to end up.

I'm almost 47, I'm a mum of two, and I'm working towards a physical goal that I've been putting off for around 15 years. I’ve had setbacks along the way and there are still things that aren't quite right physically, but I'm in a completely different place mentally now. I no longer wonder whether I might be able to do a pull-up. I know I will.

My next phase is to go back to working on those slow negatives, particularly the final part of the descent where I need to pause and build strength in the exact position where I struggle to initiate the pull. I'll also continue building my strength on the lat pulldown and working on the other exercises that are helping me get there.

So, the goal remains the same: one proper pull-up from a dead hang with an overhand grip. And perhaps one day I'll even get to the 10 I confidently thought I could do all those years ago. For now, I'm happy to know that I've finally stopped putting the goal off. The road ahead might still be long, but I'm on it – and for the first time, I genuinely believe I'll reach the end.

Maybe you have a goal you've been putting off for exactly the same reason. Perhaps you know it's going to take time, effort and patience, and that's what's stopping you from starting. But imagine where you could be a year from now if you started today. It doesn't have to be a pull-up. It could be anything. Sometimes you don't need to know exactly how you're going to get there. You just need to decide that you're going to start. And then keep going.